One of the best parts of having my own business is being able to arrange my schedule which includes taking time off for vacation whenever I want. One of the worst parts of having my own business is that I rarely think it’s a good time to take any time off, especially this year. I did take a week off to go visit friends and family and it was a good reminder of what it feels like to not have every hour of every day scheduled. Ahhhhh, a blank calendar for a whole week! It felt great. Sometimes I take breaks but my mind hasn’t really gotten the message and it’s still churning ideas about work stuff. This time, I really did get my brain to come on vacation with me. Now I’m picking up where I left off.
This year has been a turning point and maybe last year being a bleak and blank year has something to do with it. I couldn’t concentrate on anything in 2020 because of the stress of the uncertainty of the pandemic. Even in the middle of it, I thought to myself that someday I’d look back on all the free time and wish I would have used it more productively and I’ll need to remind myself of how it felt to stare at the computer screen and not make sense of anything. Now, it feels like ideas got piled up that whole time and now they’re flowing out like they never did before. It’s more than just ideas though, it’s also the focus to follow through with them and create things. I did create during 2020 but it was all art because I think that it was easier to access visual expression than verbal expression during that stressful time.
I’m working on so many things at once right now but I’m excited about all of them and thinking about them 24/7. I’m finally seeing how teaching completely online differs from meeting people in person and how that requires a different way to format and present my lessons. This year has flown by and I have goals to meet by the end of the year so I’m putting a lot of energy into meeting my own deadlines. I started 2021 with the fog of 2020 still lingering in my brain, but I know I’ll start 2022 with a clarity and vision that I never had before.